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Mettabel's Corner

I Am a Virtuous Woman... Can You Handle Me?

I Am a Virtuous Woman... Can You Handle Me?


By Mettabel Okulaja

A friend and I had a conversation one day, and at the end of the conversation, we arrived at the conclusion that though many a men pray for a virtuous woman (i.e. a virtuous wife), many cannot handle such a woman.

Such men pray, and when God then presents her to them. Many destroy such a woman’s will by decreeing that they are not submissive, not humble, or declaring that they are not fulfilling their God-given roles, and go ahead to use all that is in their power to break such a woman's spirit and make her ‘submissive’.

I had actually subscribed to this teaching about who a virtuous woman was for many years until the Lord showed me that this teaching is as far from the truth as the east is from the west.

When we study the Scriptures, and study them in context, we will find that sometimes what has been taught is not in its entirety, what the scripture is actually stating, “case in point ‘‘ what the scriptures, states about ‘The virtuous woman’.

So let us examine this word virtuous as described in Strong's concordance and dictionary in the context of the scripture:


Strong's H2428 - chayil







khah'·yil (Key)


Root Word (Etymology)

From חוּל(H2342)


TWOT Reference624a


Outline of Biblical Usage

1)Strength, might, efficiency, wealth, army


b)Ability, efficiency


d)Force, army


Wow! A virtuous woman is described by Scripture as a woman of strength, a woman of might, a woman of efficiency, a woman of wealth, in essence a one-woman military level army!

So from the scriptures, to assume that a virtuous woman is one who is insipid, timid, helpless, and solely dependent her man for sustenance and industry is such a wrong assumption as to be entirely against what scripture has said concerning a virtuous woman.

Now the scripture that describes a virtuous woman as a woman of industry, substance, and caliber does not give that woman a license for despotism, and demonstration of a rebellious nature, but it is actually meant to act as an allegory describing the good fortune of a man who happens to be backed by such a woman who is not only industrious, but one who will not divide her home and dishonor her husband and The Lord, by publicly taking credit for everything that she does, and trying to displace her husband when it comes to the establishment of authority and government in the home and within the society.

  • Such a woman stands 100% behind her man, and as the Bible says, seeks to do him good, and not evil, all the days of her life!

Proverbs 31:11,12
11 The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil.
12 She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.

  • Such a woman honors her husband as the head of the home.
  • Such a woman conducts herself with wisdom and presents her household in the best possible light.
  • Such a woman when backed by a great man, is actually praised publicly for her virtuousness…

So the question posed by King Solomon was: A virtuous woman - who can find such a one? For her price is far above rubies…

So I adjure all Godly men out there - when you find a virtuous woman, do not make her ‘un-virtuous’ by suppressing her God-given strengths and abilities, do not make her ‘un-virtuous’ by accusing her of wanting to take over the role of the man, do not make her ‘un-virtuous’ by putting her down at every opportunity you have because by so doing, you truncate the blessing that God has placed in your life to help make you great – a man who is respected in the gates.

Again a strong, efficient, industrious, hard-working, wealthy, strong, forceful woman of substance and ability - who can find such a woman? If you find her o wise man, according to the word of the Lord you do your best to keep, cherish her, and bless God for giving her to you, for her price in your life is far above rubies… Selah.

He that has an ear let him hear…

Much love from me to you.

© AdePero Mettabel, 04/28/13.



Proverbs 31:10-31

King James Version (KJV)


10 Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.

11 The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil.

12 She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.

13 She seeketh wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands.

14 She is like the merchants' ships; she bringeth her food from afar.

15 She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens.

16 She considereth a field, and buyeth it: with the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard.

17 She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms.

18 She perceiveth that her merchandise is good: her candle goeth not out by night.

19 She layeth her hands to the spindle, and her hands hold the distaff.

20 She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy.

21 She is not afraid of the snow for her household: for all her household are clothed with scarlet.

22 She maketh herself coverings of tapestry; her clothing is silk and purple.

23 Her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land.

24 She maketh fine linen, and selleth it; and delivereth girdles unto the merchant.

25 Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come.

26 She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.

27 She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.

28 Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.

29 Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all.

30 Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised.

31 Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates.


Mettabel Okulaja, MD is an Internal Medicine physician, and an inspirational speaker. She lives in Eden Prairie Minnesota. She is also the author of 'The Voice of One Woman' - A rich anthology of prose, poems, original quotes and short stories, platformed on her own discovery of herself as a deliberate and beautiful uniquely created being.

Her book is available online both in paper and eBook formats, on, and wherever great books are sold.